Children and Boundaries!


The title sounds tough. Yesterday I had a conversation with some friends about boundaries and whether they are useful to a child’s growth. Several opinions were heard on the matter. Should parents put boundaries?

One friend of mine is an only child. When she was young, her parents bought her everything she asked for and she was constantly getting presents for everything she achieved no matter how small that was (e.g. an A in Physics test). Now that she is all grown up, she can’t have a healthy relationship in her life and she seems to want things to go her way all the time. She isn’t always polite to others and she overestimates herself.

On the other hand, not all children have the same needs. There are quite a few incidents where the parents misunderstand the essence of putting boundaries and as a result  end up being very strict and even oppressive to their own children.

How can parents be sure enough that they won’t get things worse instead of getting them better?  Is there a special recipe?

Every child is different and should be treated specially and that can’t be an easy job.

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